I am a perfectionist in theory. I hate doing things and having them turn out to be less than what I imagined they should be. As you can imagine this can cause quite a bit of frustration. But what I’m learning to do is let go of my idea of perfection. I am starting to understand that starting something and completing it is much more valuable than ignoring my passions and instincts just because I may make a mistake. In truth it’s not my desire to be perfect that holds me back. It’s fear. Fear of how I will be perceived, or what will happen next.
What I’ve been trying to do by writing daily, is to push myself beyond being comfortable. I am forcing myself to live out my failures as well as my successes. Every post isn’t perfect. Heck some of them aren’t even good. That’s OK. It’s OK for others, but more importantly it’s OK for me. I don’t have to be 100% all the time. I put too much pressure on myself, and it makes me miserable.
Of course this is something that I tell myself frequently. By nature , I will always want my best foot to be the only one put forward. But I remember that I accept and love people for who they are. I have to trust that others will see enough value in me to accept me in my various states of mind.
I’m growing more confident everyday. I know that nothing can stop me but myself. And as long as I keep picking myself back up, nothing has to be perfect it just has to be done.